If you want a breakdown of capitalism’s corporate idea of masculinity for the masses, look no further than the Hugo Boss aftershave advertisement “Man of Today”, starring and narrated by none other than the manly man, Gerard Butler. In it, we are taken on journey to explore and uncover what it actually is to be a “man of today”.
Self-Righteous Rants
Here I will share with you what is shitting me, shocking me and generally arousing my self-righteous scorn and overall dumbfoundedness. Satire is meant to challenge established power, not ridicule the powerless, and that’s what I hope to do here, as well as poke fun at what I read that seems beyond stupid.
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Rise Up Giant Mutant Ant Overlords, the World Needs You
Given us non-ant humans have ruled the earth for a while now, I think it’s time we allowed another species to step in and take over. Giant mutant ants I think could be the wise choice.
Kellogg’s attempts to be the “Dove” of crappy breakfast cereals: Watch a contrived and conceited viral video that’s an insult to women’s intelligence.
The short 60 second video tells women that they should stop worrying about how they look and “own” who they are. That is after they stuffed their face with Special K…such a powerful message.
Calling bullshit where it’s obvious: Demi Lovato and Taylor Swift combine objectification with glorified violence and call it “female empowerment.”
How do you show you’re equal to men? Well, you copy all the cliché cultural stereotypes of what it is to be masculine, and then do exactly what they do, but in Spandex and tight-fitting outfits
HOW FASHION AND TECH TIGHTENED THEIR GREEDY AND SOCIPATHIC BOND IN 2015:
Fashion and Tech industries do a have a lot in common in way they successful create false needs, wants and desires in the citizenry so Joe Public just mindlessly and continuously buys more and more useless shit at the price of destroying our earth and undermining our personal sense of worth and value.
Dolmio Sauce tries to hack our brain into thinking it gives a shit
Of course, all of this rests on the premise these mothers are so piss-weak and lacking in any parental authority whatsoever, that their capacity to just walk over and turn the TV off or take away their baby twats devices themselves, is a total non-idea in the first place.
7 reasons why a job sucks and most bosses are assholes
No matter what field you’re in — health, engineering, media, education, design, etc. — you (most likely) answer to some form of hierarchical authority. Because we essentially prostitute our time for monetary gain in order to survive, we are beholden to the whims, demands and scrutiny of bosses.
Man pranks his wife that their 3-year-old son is killed in an explosion, and in doing so puts himself as the frontrunner for 2015’s Biggest Asshole of the Year award.
This guy in question uses his son to prank his girlfriend into thinking their toddler has sped off on a quad and has crashed and died in an explosion. Luckily for her, she only seems to buy it very briefly, as she’s obviously well-acquainted with his douche-baggery.
$31 million Wedding in China Officially Confirms the End of Days is Approaching
In China, this couple spent $31 million on their wedding. That’s one day, one dress, one ring and all the other fluff associated with that special day. $31 friggen million, WTF! It’s obscene in whatever context you see it, but it’s particularly blasé given the immense poverty in Shanghai where the wedding took place.
A New Form of Vanity Porn: Giving Money to the Homeless and Filming How Awesome You Are
Be it for commercial gain, scout badges or just because they are looking for a nice, warm and fuzzy feeling, being charitable in this context has an agenda. As soon as you record and upload it for all to see, your charity has stopped being charity and become vanity porn.